I remember when my mom was in her 70s, there was a few years where she told me she was going to funerals at least once a month for quite a while. During that time, I could see her change as she was dealing with her own mortality. She was probably dealing with it before then, although this was the first time that I witnessed that with her.
This past week I learned a good friend had an advanced stage of cancer and may be facing his mortality. For some reason this one really hit me hard. He is a close friend yet not one I see often and or talk to regularly, yet we have a deep connection. I have never really been scared of my death although I always carry a fear of someone dying that is close to me. It is times like this I wonder why and yet I know that question is not supposed to be answered…… it is because it is…..and it is their journey.
After I heard the news this week, I spent some quiet time praying and what came up for was for me not to focus on whether or not death would come and when, it was to live life fully everyday. I reminded me of a saying my old therapist, Nancy White, told me “Tomorrow is a dangerous assumption.” If I live life like there is no tomorrow, then I will have no regrets.
I know he will live his life on his terms and I know he is a fighter and this may just be one more of his many challenges……and it also could be his swan song. Either way what he taught me was to love myself and keep believing that I make a difference in this world by being me and inspiring men to a life of joy, connection and love. Accepting my mortality this week has been a wake-up call and a loving reminder from a good friend, embrace the moment…..I am.
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