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Feedback was considered a negative thing in the music world until Jimi Hendrix came along. When Jimi was recording with the BBC in London, he would turn his amplifiers up all the way and create feedback from his amp. The recording engineers were frustrated and told Jimi “We cannot get that feedback out of your sound, you will have to turn your amp down.” Jimi’s reply was “that is exactly the sound I have been going after, just record it.”……….the rest is history.

My life is a parallel between human behavior and music. Feedback out of control can be quite annoying but some nice feedback at the right times can enhance the music exponentially. I find this true in my life also. When my daughter Kelsey asks for “advice” I tell her, “I don’t give advice although I have some feedback if you would like.” Seems like semantics, yet it is not.

Feedback is just like it sounds, I am feeding back to the person I am listening to what I heard so I can get clarity on what they are saying. It also gives them the gift of being heard…… a small yet powerful gift. Feedback in relationships can get out of control just like in music. Sometimes I use the term feedback as a thinly veiled attempt to fix someone. They know it and I know it.

What I have found lately is that the hardest feedback I hear is from me. I can be so hard on myself and the feedback I give myself can be so critical at times. I am working on changing that. I have a choice everyday to give myself all kinds of feedback and what I am choosing is to make that feedback nurturing, compassionate, and kind.

Interestingly enough, the kinder I am to myself, the kinder I am to others, and the kinder they are to me. It amazes me how simple life can be when I stay in my heart. I wonder what feedback Jimi was looking for.

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